A Cinderella Sandwich

Outside the snow was falling, the wind was blowing, the temperature was plummeting.  It was the weekend, we had food in the house and no place that we had to go.  We stayed home because we could.  This means I finally had some time to catch up with all those Facebook quizzes, so now I know what Disney Princess I'd be, what musical I'd star in, and what food I would be.

Some of the results are uncanny in their accuracy.  For instance, if I were a Disney Princess, I would be Cinderella. Well, no kidding!  That is absolutely correct.  I have identified with Cinderella since I was a kid watching the incomparable Leslie Ann Warren in the televised Rodgers and Hammerstein version.  Of course, I also identified with the Stepsisters (Why would a fella want a girl like her, a girl who's merely lovely, Why can't a fella ever once prefer, a girl who's merely me?)  

Just to keep with that underdog theme, the musical I would be in would be Wicked.  Also appropriate because I fully understand from bitter first-hand experience that it's not easy being green (or different in some other way).  At my age I would be playing Madame Morrible not Elphaba, which is just as well because if I were Elphaba I'd be flying while singing "Defying Gravity," both pursuits fraught with the potential for disaster.  Besides Mr. Rip hates it when I sing that song, but then he hates it when anyone sings that song.

If I were a Big Bang Theory character I'd be Amy Farrah Fowler.  Well, I would have guessed Leonard, but I do look more like Mayim Bialek than anyone else on the show.  Come to think of it, I am not a scientist and I'm not frustrated in my relationship (because Mr. Rip is really not anything like Sheldon no matter what he tells you), and I sure hope I am just a bit more fashionable than she is.  Other than that I'm just like her.

If I were a food, I'd be a sandwich - something about being flexible and portable and you can take me anywhere.  Well, okay, but if I were a sandwich I'd want to be an Italian hoagie or an Eat n Park Tuna Melt.

I was delighted to find out that the city I should be living in is Paris.  Naturally, I've never been there but I've always wanted to visit.  I just love those French composers and I desperately want to experience the Louvre.  I also understand that Parisians eat a lot of bread and cheese and walk a lot, which really does sound like me.  The way I see it I really will have to visit Paris now just to determine if the quiz got it right.

So I was game when they told me I would be Wilma if I were a Flintstone (I am someone's mother), or Captain Kirk in Star Trek (I don't really see it but William Shatner is just so damn cool) or  Souki on The Gilmore Girls (at least I wasn't Kurt). I was a little more skeptical when they said that I was Tom Branson on Downton Abbey, or Pinky in Grease (Pinky??  Not Jan?).

But it all really went south when The Hunger Games quiz revealed that I would be Katniss.  What??  Fierce, unbeatable bad-ass survivor Katniss? Goodness.  I thought I'd be Cinna, or whichever minor character was chosen to be in the Games and who died of fear on the way to the Arena.

Well, maybe I can channel my inner Katniss when I have to venture out into the world again and face the elements.