The Rack of the Misfit Clothes

I swear I was only walking through Macy’s because I had parked my car in their garage when I needed to attend a meeting downtown.  I honestly never meant to stop.

So, I walked through the shoe department, pass the clothes and I was almost through the Clearance section when I saw it.  The rack that was marked “85% off.”

Now the “85% off” rack is a tricky place to look for clothes.  The clearance racks are full of off-season clothes, odd sizes, and clothes that just aren’t that pretty, but you can often find some great clothes at ridiculous prices, even if you might not be able to wear what you buy for six or seven months.

 

But the clothes that find their way to the “85% off” rack are like clothing versions of the toys on Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer’s Island of Misfit Toys.  Like Charlie-in-the-Box, or the Cowboy who rides an ostrich, they’re just a little bit different in a way that might make them undesirable, which is why no one bought them in the first place.  It is The Rack of the Misfit Clothes.

I couldn’t resist just taking a look.  I walked towards the rack. Then I saw it.  It was hanging, right on the end of the rack, facing out, like a beacon beckoning to me.  I’d been thinking about getting something like it for months.  It was a beautiful red winter jacket with black buttons, and the only one like it on the rack.  It had my name written all over it.

I moved closer and picked it up.  Oh.  I realized that I wasn’t in the Plus Size department, and it was only a "regular" X-Large.  Might this be the end of a beautiful relationship, before it even began?  I wasn’t willing to give up on this particular dream just yet.

I tried the beautiful red coat on.  It slipped on, it buttoned – it fit!  I couldn’t believe it.  I decided to double check with a professional.

“Hey – this actually fits, doesn’t it?” I asked the nearby saleswoman.

“Um, yes, it does,” she answered, pleasantly.

“And it is really 85% off?  It’s not on the wrong rack?”  I asked.

We verified the price.  $15.57.    It was settled. I announced that I would be buying the coat.

“There are a lot more coats on sale upstairs,” the salesperson offered helpfully.

I didn’t want any other coat.  This coat was coming home with me.

When we got to the register, another salesperson joined us. 

“Wow!  This is a really nice coat, but wait- is it a Spring coat?” she said.

“I told her there were more coats upstairs,” the first saleslady defended herself.

“Ladies, you don’t seem to understand,” I clarified, “this is the coat that I want – this coat and I were made for each other.”

I knew before I left the store that the jacket was made of some sort of extra-heavy fleece-like material, so it looked like a winter jacket but was probably more appropriate for temperatures in the 30’s or 40’s than the teens. And when I got it home I realized that the sleeves were about 6 inches too long.  Obviously the designers were using an orangutan for a model.  But this was not really a problem, because my limited sewing skills do include hemming sleeves.

So, in the end, my new beautiful winter(ish) jacket was more like a “Dolly for Sue” –the seemingly normal doll on the Island of Misfit Toys.  It just needed to find a home with someone who loved it.