The Joints Are Jumpin'

Good news, everyone! I have been diagnosed as having osteoarthritis in my neck and my knees, and some condition I can’t spell in my hands!


Why is this good news, you ask? When I named this column “Rip Aches All Over” it was supposed to be a joke. And it IS a joke, but it is also happens to be true. I have been literally aching all over (mostly in various joints) for a very long time now. Some of my aches date back 20 years, with no real relief, treatment or diagnosis. I once had a foot infection that lasted almost three months that stumped a number of doctors. A barrage of tests was inconclusive. I suddenly found myself a devotee of Mystery Diagnosis, that show where people suffer a wide variety of awful ailments for years, and no one can tell them why.

Basically, whenever I would bring my joint pain to the attention to my general practitioners they would say that I probably had a “little arthritis” and that there was nothing to do about it unless it got so bad that it would require surgery.

I’m no doctor but I just thought that there must be SOME course of action between “nothing” and “surgery,” especially if there actually was arthritis involved. I am not a big fan of surgery. So, I decided, on my own, to go to a rheumatologist. After 20 years, within an hour, after a couple of x-rays, I had an official diagnosis. The really good news is that it is moderate arthritis, I still have full motion in all my joints and there is LOTS I can do to relieve the pain and improve my conditions. One of the “new” things the doctor prescribed was physical therapy.

When I went for my evaluation, Dennis (the therapist) reiterated that I indeed had a myriad of problems with my joints. “You have a LOT going on here,” he said. Yes, yes, I KNOW that I do! But then he set out to DO something about it, with heating pads and electrical stimulus in the problem areas, and deep heating treatments, and some sort of procedure where he massaged my neck and pulled my head away from my shoulders (don’t try this at home, kids). “Boy, your neck is REALLY tight,” he said, several times.

When I went to leave, his assistant asked if I needed to return. “Oh, yes,” he responded, “she’s a mess.” Yes, yes, I AM a mess! That’s what I’ve been trying to tell the doctors all these years. With the sudden validation of my complaints, and with my neck feeling better than it had in years, I couldn’t even bring myself to feel insulted by this. Dennis suggested that I return twice a week for four to six weeks. I happily agreed.

On my second visit, I saw Mike. After more of the heat treatment, and hot wax treatment for my hands, and more massage, he set about giving me some exercises for my knees, neck and hands. “You need to build up your quadriceps to stabilize your knees,” he proclaimed. Yes, yes, I DO…wait a minute. Quadriceps? Those are my thighs, right? Good heavens, would we be working on making my thighs even BIGGER? Oh, this was no time for vanity. It would be a small price to pay if it meant that my knees wouldn’t give out on a regular basis.

So it’s been four days since my second physical therapy session, and I have been doing my exercises religiously. I can’t even explain to you how much better I feel already. Where oh where has physical therapy been all my life? I swear my neck is looser and a little bit longer than it had been. Even if physical therapy doesn’t change my life, it may just change my neck.