Have You Ever Really Loved a (Plus Size) Woman?

It is hard to imagine what possessed Kenneth Krause to write the hurtful, presumptuous e-mail taking Wisconsin TV anchorwoman Jennifer Livingston to task for her weight, calling her a bad role model for the community’s young people, especially the girls.  I don’t know what sort of response he expected, but I am pretty sure that he did not anticipate what happened next.

You see, Mike Thompson, Livingston’s husband and also an anchor at the same news station, was pretty upset at what he considered an inappropriate attack on his wife.  He posted the e-mail on his Facebook page, generating an outpouring of support for Jennifer.  This prompted her to offer a 4-minute editorial on the news, addressing Krause’s e-mail, calling him a bully and saying that to call her an unfit role model for the community solely based on her appearance was unacceptable.  It’s all gone viral, and has sparked a national debate on the subject.

Oh, I could have told Kenneth that he really never wants to mess with a guy in love with a plus sized woman.  He probably didn’t realize that it was possible for obese women to have men who loved them and who actually thought they were beautiful just exactly the way they were.  Trust me it is, and these guys are fiercely protective of their ample ladies.  Ever hear of “more to love,” Kenneth?

Thin was never really “in” with my husband, who actively and vocally appreciated what he likes to refer to as my “curves” from the very beginning of our relationship.  He really did call me one day shortly after we started dating to let me know that he would love me even if I was skinny.  He did not want me to think that he was attracted to me just for my body.

So it shouldn’t have come as a surprise when he shared with me how he told off the salesladies at Victoria’s Secret in the Ross Park Mall when shopping for my birthday one year.  He innocently inquired whether they carried larger sizes.  According to him it was the condescending and snobby manner of their response that prompted him to proclaim, “The problem with you people is that you don’t realize that big women can be sexy, too!” before storming out of the store.  Isn’t that cute?  How I wished I could have been a bug on the wall of that store to see their faces.

Yes, Kenneth, you might have gotten away with messing with Jennifer but you didn’t count on Mike’s response, whose anger with you after reading your e-mail was as palpable and evident as his passionate love for his wife was.

For the record, Jennifer Livingston is exactly the kind of role model I would like to see for the children of my community.  She is a professional woman who has been working in her high-profile job for 15 years while maintaining a healthy relationship and starting a family.  None of this has anything to do with her weight, which should no more be a factor in her professional life than her race, gender, religion, or sexual orientation.  Furthermore, she took the opportunity in her articulate editorial to caution parents to watch what they say around their children because cruelty is learned and told kids that it is never okay to be a bully or to be bullied.  Role model?  Heck, right about now she’s my hero.

By the way, as long as we’re debating this nationally now, where will the infringement on our personal freedom in this country end?  Since when did it become a crime to be big, or even unhealthy?  In the past 18 months, I have been eating right and exercising and managing my arthritis.  I am feeling pretty darn healthy these days.  Despite losing more than 40 pounds in the process, I am still “obese” according to the arbitrary health and weight charts that do not take into account that larger people can be healthy, too.

I am sure there are people out there who presume to judge me. But my husband still loves me just exactly the way I am, and he always will.