Straight Man Dancing (the Great Swayze Debate)

I came across this never-published piece that I wrote circa 1994. Here it is, as I wrote it, when Patrick Swayze was very much alive. I dedicate this to his memory and to Jen, wherever she is.

Deep in the bowels of a Student Union, in an alternative universe known as a college campus, there once was a spot known as the Times Suite. Every Wednesday night about 25 students, largely between the ages of 18 and 25, worked late into the night to put the student newspaper to bed. We were dedicated to the truth, the article, the paper itself, and to satisfying the requirements for our Journalism classes.

Among the typing of articles, the laying out of copy, the developing of photographs, and the all-important making of coffee, was the sharing of minds. Debating the larger, and some of the smaller, issues of the day, we discussed the sexes (and the battles that persist between them), music, politics, school, campus issues, and the MTV Video Music Awards. But the topic that was to shatter our little group, to inspire the hottest controversy among us was…Patrick Swayze.

To this day, I am not sure how he came up. All I know is that the mention of his name provoked an extremely violent physical and emotional reaction in my young friend, Jen.

“EWW,” she shuttered as though she had just heard fingernails on a blackboard. “Patrick Swayze??” I HATE him,” she said with a vehement loathing I had not witnessed in her since we had discussed cheerleaders, homecoming queens, and other girls with big hair.

“Really?” I said, surprised. “”I like him.”

“NO!” Jen stared at me in abject horror as though I had just told her that I admired Adolph Hitler. “You can’t like Patrick Swayze. You really don’t, do you?”

“Well, yes, I really do,” I answered, not seeing why I should deny it. I was pretty sure that I wasn’t the only woman in America who felt this way. Nonetheless I felt compelled to rationalize my fondness for Mr. Swayze to Jen, who was obviously not a fan.

To risk sounding shallow, Patrick Swayze looks really good all the time. This was especially true in Dirty Dancing, a movie I have seen several times and have every intention of seeing again.

Furthermore Patrick really can act- believable enough for me in any role. He displays a certain passion in his roles and takes chances in his choices of roles. He considers himself to be an actor, not a star, and is dedicated to his craft. That sort of purity of purpose is always attractive in a guy.

Finally, Patrick seems like a genuinely nice guy and decent person in real life. He adores his wife openly, calling her his soul mate. He is sensitive and open, even crying in a Barbara Walters interview. But obviously I’m missing some horrible flaw; some big reason I should be repelled by Patrick Swayze.

No one’s mind was changed that night. Jen remained firm in her distaste for Patrick Swayze, and I found myself suddenly in the mood to see Dirty Dancing again. Maybe it was an age thing. I WAS older than the other kids.

The incident left its mark on me. One day at work someone mentioned a Patrick Swayze movie. Like an alcoholic caught in her addiction, I nervously confessed that I liked him and launched into all the reasons why.
My friend Christie listened for a few minutes before she touched my arm and shook her head gently to stop my long-winded explanation. “Sharon,” she said wisely, “he’s a straight man who can dance.”

Doesn’t that just sum it up?! As convincing as he might have been in To Wong Foo, we know he’s straight. And even Jen couldn’t deny that he could dance. Isn’t that what most women are really looking for in a guy? Some nice, sensitive, straight man who can dance, or who would at the very least be willing to fake it at our cousin’s wedding? That’s exactly why I like Patrick Swayze so much. And he can dirty dance for me anytime.